“There are many misconceptions out there – the biggest myth being that a life coach teaches life skills. You wouldn’t see a life coach because you have problems. We all have problems. You would see a life coach because you are feeling stuck and you do not know the best way to move forward. Coaching will help you to explore all your options and then help you to implement the change that suits you best. Coaching is at its essence a ‘Methodology for change’ “.
The agenda varies dramatically from person to person. Sometimes clients are very clear about what they want to achieve. Other times clients know what they ‘don’t want’ in life and we spend a few sessions getting clear about what they do want. When we have clarity and can define what they would prefer to have (preferred reality versus current reality) then we move closer to that outcome by taking small steps (or giant leaps) one day at a time.
Helping clients shift from their current reality to their preferred reality depends on many variables. For example:
• The nature of the problem and the depth of the work involved
• Whether the presenting problem turns out to be the actual problem
• How confident and willing the individual is toward creating change in their life
• The cost of change and the benefits of staying stuck
• The level of a client’s self awareness etc.
Some examples of coaching agendas:
Improve work performance
Improve time management
Improve relationship skills
Improve communication skills
Establish work/life balance
Identifying strengths and development areas – Enneagram & Character assessment
Clarifying goals and strategies for success- Who do I need to be, in order to have what I want, so that I can achieve in the way I would like?
Decision making – providing clarity at crossroads and for multidimensional dilemmas
Empowering Yourself- reclaiming ones power back from a disempowered/overpowered state
Authentic Living- how to create a life that is an expression of ones true self
Dating Deliberating -personal discovery and relationship reading process
Marriage preparation- maintaining effortless and resilient partnerships
Couples/pairs in conflict- reassembling mutual regard/respect between 2 people
Exploring problem patterns of behaviour- creating new way of relating
Identifying limiting beliefs in relationships- addressing the cause not the symptom
Facilitation of Relationship Awareness and Total SDI inventories (http://www.personalstrengths.com/)
Exploring the impact of blind-spots and emotional baggage
Ironically, developing personally, becoming familiar with ones triggers and improving relationship skills can be the best ‘therapy’ for a couple in crisis. This is addressed in the article ‘The best couple therapy is individual therapy’.