Love is a Collaborative Work of Art

One of my favourite ways to spend my spare time is to watch TED talks- videos of 20 minutes or less – the place where thought leaders are invited to deliver ideas worth sharing. If you haven’t browsed the TED library yet, you really are missing out on a phenomenal source of inspiration. So, I[…]

avoiding conflict

The downside to Harmonious People.

I have the privilege of meeting a broad spectrum of personality types in my work. I am often asked “Are some personalities better suited for relationships than others?” and I would say that no one ‘type’ is better or worse. Of course, some people are better suited for partnering than others, better at being a team player[…]

Couples who make it work

‘Follow your bliss’. I see it, hear it, read it constantly in my never-ending research on what it means to live and work well.  One man, whose passion it was to get a date and have a girlfriend, began researching and studying ‘what makes couples work’ over those who couldn’t seem to get it right.[…]

Men decoded

Cross communication? It may not come as a surprise to anyone that scientific research is now proving that men and women’s brains are different. My friend and colleague Mary Ovenstone, a leadership and executive coach, is currently researching ‘the neurological differences between the male and female brain’ for her thesis. She says it was always[…]

Is monogamy a realistic concept?

I was so pleased the subject of monogamy has come up. It is one of those things we take for granted and assume is a requirement or non-negotiable for everyone in a romantic partnership. Actually, it’s not. Anthropology has shown that humans are ‘designed’ to have more than one partner in order to protect the[…]

MFM92.6 Q + A: How can I help a sad friend?

[audio:http://relationshipcoach.blog.com/files/2011/11/Shelley-28-Nov.mp3|titles=Shelley (28 Nov)] A listener says, \”My friend often goes through bouts of sadness, it lasts about a day or two and then she’s fine again. It gets me down as well and I don’t know how to help\”. Life, love and relationship coach Shelley Lewin answers listener’s questions every Monday at 08h30 on MFM.92.6.[…]

MFM92.6 Q + A: How can I manage repressed emotion?

[audio:http://relationshipcoach.blog.com/files/2011/11/Shelley-7-Nov.mp3|titles=Shelley (7 Nov)] A listener says, \”When I’m drunk I text a girlfriend from two years ago with messages that (I see later) are quite pathetic. When I’m sober I feel like I’m coping with the situation. It’s confusing, I’m not sure how I feel or how to deal with what might be repressed emotions.\” Life,[…]

MFM92.6 Q + A: How can I ‘fight fair’?

[audio:http://relationshipcoach.blog.com/files/2011/11/Shelley-31-Oct.mp3|titles=Shelley (31 Oct)] Constructive fighting   A listener says, \”My sister and I argue all the time. Sometimes it escalates into full-out vicious fights. We’re always trying to outdo each other, even though we love each other. How can we deal with this?\” Life, love and relationship coach Shelley Lewin answers listener’s questions every Monday[…]

MFM92.6 Q + A: I avoid conflict. Is this going to become a problem?

[audio:http://relationshipcoach.blog.com/files/2011/10/Shelley-24-October.mp3|titles=Shelley (24 October)] A listener says, \”I’m in a good relationship, but when my partner and I disagree I’m not very confrontational and just let him ‘win’. Could this bite me in the butt a few years down the line?\” Life, love and relationship coach Shelley Lewin answers listener’s questions every Monday at 08h30 on[…]

Converting issues into intimacy in 5 steps

1 400 words = 5 minutes to read A relationship is live and organic like a living organism/plant. Every interaction we get to choose whether what we do is going to make the relationship better (like nurturing and watering) or worse (like neglect and intense heat). It is an ongoing choice to either help it[…]